I'm not too keen on spending much time on this post as I pretty much hated every minute of the 90 minute Rockettes' Radio City Christmas Spectacular. I take that back. There was a single segment- Parade of the Wooden Soldiers- that I found enjoyable. These five minutes were the only part in the production where I wasn't aching to gouge my eyes out and cut off my ears. Apparently this is the Rockettes most famous number; it has appeared in the annual show since 1933. I feel somewhat guilty for lambasting such beloved NYC icons, and it's not even the Rockettes with whom I take umbrage, it's everything that surrounded them- a saccharine story of utter banality(This is a bastardization of NYC's reputation for great talent), truly atrocious acting(ditto!), embarrassingly cheesy special effects(It's 2012! Scorcese has mastered 3D storytelling in the beautiful Hugo,and we can see it for $13. How are these people getting away with charging $55 for a lame Santa's sleigh ride short with 3D effects from 1972? Attempting to be cutting edge and failing miserably.), and performers dressed up in giant animal fur suits prancing around to irritatingly bad music(Should a show at a historic venue in NYC be reminiscent of something you might see at a Six Flags or at a furry fandom convention?) And I could have really done without all the token religious nonsense. I think this performance proved that there is no god. And I sat through it all waiting for the trademark denouement when the Rockettes would kick their precious little hearts out for an eternity wowing the audience with their endurance...kicking and kicking for so long that the audience begins to feel sympathy pangs of exhaustion.....and the moment never came. Isn't that what the Rockettes are known for? So disappointing.
The best thing about the show was getting to see the inside of the historic Radio City Music Hall, which is a beautiful theatre. Just look at that chandelier! There was a film I saw when I was maybe five or six years old that instilled a lifelong anxiety into me when in the presence of large chandeliers. All I remember about it was that there was a woman who was terrified of walking under a particular chandelier in the mansion that I believe she had moved into when she married a rich man. And the grand finale of the film was of course death by chandelier for the leading lady. Over the years I have searched and searched for this film but I can't seem to find it anywhere. Undying gratitude to anyone who can educate me on the title of the film or on any other relevant info about it.
The Rockettes deserve credit for being lovely women, for having amazing legs, and for having a fantastic talent. It's just unfortunate that instead of creating an artistic show of substance around their unique skills, producers choose to overshadow their talent with a dumbed-down, highly commercialized spectacle with no redeeming aesthetic value.
The Parade of the Wooden Soldiers:
"It's a senseless thing/ Desire to be loved by everyone" --Lloyd Cole,
Radio City Music Hall
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