Yawnsical the Consical...

Playbill for Newsical the Musical

My bff of thirteen years, Stacey, was visiting from Texas over the weekend. We met in college, where we did theatre together. Though I was kind of a loner and  she was Miss Popularity on campus, we became instant friends. She went on to be a pharmacist, wife, and mother of two ridiculously beautiful children. And I went on to be a vagabond. We lead very different lives. And seemingly we are very different people to those around us, but we know how similar we actually are, and we've always shared something very special. I don't believe in soulmates or heroes, but if I did, she would be mine. I don't have the time to express all the ways in which she is amazing, so you'll just have to take my word for it. Anyway, we are total theatre nerds, and when together, which unfortunately is not often, you will most likely find us breaking out into various musical numbers at the top of our lungs, tunes from Hair and Rent perhaps being our favorite. We showed up at the Eugene O'Neill Theatre on Saturday evening to participate in the lottery for The Book of Mormon. That was a fun experience in and of itself, but unfortunately, luck was not on our side. 

So we ventured to the TKTS booth to find ourselves a bargain. Avenue Q was in our price range, and though we've heard rave reviews from everyone who has seen it, and though we know it has won the Tony for Best Musical, we just weren't feeling the puppets. One of the promoters started hard-selling Newsical the Musical. It's his favorite show out right now, he says.  It just won an off-Broadway Alliance Award, he says. He compares it to SNL and gushes over its hilarity. It's in our price range, we are indecisive, and its snowing, so we take his recommendation so we can be on our way. After the show, Stacey and I discussed returning to the TKTS booth and demanding reimbursement from that guy.

There were four cast members- two men, and two women- all of which were lacking energy and enthusiasm; they appeared positively bored. I can hardly blame them given the material with which they had to work. Apparently you cannot escape the Kardashians, even at the theatre. Some of the other skits involving not-yet overdone current events characters, i.e. Mitt Romney, Paula Deen, and a certain disgraced Italian ship Captain, were simply lackluster. These are people who deserve skewering, and should be easy targets if you are in the business of skewering. But the jokes were cliché, the songs were mediocre. No cutting edge or remotely intelligent comedy was being showcased.  None of the actors exhibited much if any stage presence or charisma to speak of. The two male actors were so bland that they aren't even worth discussing. Christine Pedi delivered some laughs with spot-on impersonations of Joan Rivers, Liza 'with a Z' Minnelli, Nancy Grace, and Fran Drescher. I don't know if the blasé attitude she exudes is part of her schtick but if so, it came across as a combination of sleepiness and annoyance. She seems soooo over it. Christina Bianco, the token vocalist of the group, was the most dynamic of the bunch. The 'Christina Aguilera singing the national anthem' was her strongest and funniest bit, but it could have benefited from extensive and exaggerated vocal runs, as Aguilera is known to do, as well as a drunken and ungraceful exit. The show was forgettable, overall. I don't enjoy saying it, as it always makes me uncomfortable negatively criticizing the artistic endeavors of others, but it is all I can say. As the topical show follows headlines, the parodies and songs are ever-changing, which is a massively respectable feat by composer-lyricist Rick Crom. Perhaps it is thus possible that attending the production at an alternate date could render a positive review. 

The Kirk Theatre is a small 99 seat theatre that is part of the newly renovated Theatre Row complex, which houses five other historic theatres, including The Beckett Theatre.  Aside from being unable to remove my coat or gloves during the production due to the Siberian chill in the air, it was a nice space. I very much look forward to attending more productions at Theatre Row.

Speaking of SNL and hilarious musical impersonations, alumnus Jimmy Fallon does some dead on performances as Neil Young, Bruce Springsteen, Bob Dylan, Dave Matthews, etc... I'm not necessarily a Fallon fan generally speaking, but I cannot deny his awesomeness when he picks up a guitar. Here he is as Neil Young, accompanied by The Boss dressed as a younger version of himself, singing LMFAO's infectious hit I'm Sexy and I Know It....so funny:

Bruce Springsteen and Neil Young (Jimmy Fallon) are Sexy and They Know It

"When you think that Andy Rooney's sort of witty/ You're in denial" -- Cast of Newsical the Musical, Denial